Wednesday, April 30, 2003
TV Is An Evil Entity
Television has become an essential part of my daily routine lately. Wake up in the morning, see what's on TV. While I'm getting ready, TV's on in the background. Back from class, turn on the TV. Done with homework, let's see what's on TV. 6:00, it's time for Will & Grace. And then, of course, there's all the shows that I've just become addicted to...
American Idol. Besides the fact that the plague known as Carmen stuck around as long as she did, I've thoroughly enjoyed this show. Compared to last year's show, the majority of this group actually has talent...and marketable talent, at that. But, even though I risk my life by saying anything of this sort....Clay Aiken should seriously just go away. EVERYTHING about that boy is just annoying as all hell...first off, he looks like a fucking alien. Everytime the spotlight shines down on him on stage, I'm thinking it's Scotty beaming him back up to the Enterprise or something. I wouldn't be surprised to find out that he's got some sort of mad Vulcan power or some shit. And then there's the lame-ass facial expressions he makes at the crowd. If I had to endure him squinting through an entire song one more time, I will be sawing away at my wrists as I watch. Oh, and for the teen girls out there....HE'S GAY!! He's not going to kiss you! Stop making those ridiculous posters! And Joshua Gracin? Oh I'm pop, no I'm country, no I'm pop again, whoops I'm country...wait, what am I supposed to be this week? GONE, that's what. Now that the war's over and 99% of Americans have mysteriously lost their newfound patriotism, Mr. Marine doesn't stand a chance of making it another week. Ruben. What can be said about him? He's gonna win. Duh. I think that even the diehard Clay fans know this and are plotting his assassination this very minute. I've loved Trenyce since the start of the show...and now that Kimberly Caldwell has bit the dust, she and Kimberly Locke are the only two I'm actually rooting for. Once they're both gone, I will be as well. It will take an absolute miracle for either of them to be one of the last two standing...I mean, you can have an entire speed dialing posse assembled for these two and the fans of Clay/Ruben will still conquer all. And will Ryan Seacrest please officially come out of the closet already so Simon will stop trying to pull him out of it?
Survivor. It's no secret that I love Survivor. Anyone who remotely knows me, knows this. Way back when I first started this blog, I would lamely give my weekly predictions about the Marquesas season...and 9.9 times out of 10, I was so off it wasn't even funny. And I'm sure that if I were to do the same thing this season, I'd be just as off. But, I must say...this season has been the most entertaining since the original. Even though the whole boys vs. girls vibe was totally gone after about four episodes, it's still been a fun ride. I'm rooting for Jenna at this point...because she's just a bitch and I don't care. I want to see a bitch win this thing for once. On the reunion show, I want to see her look into all the other contestant's eyes and say, "Nyah nyah, I whooped your asses, losers." And she would...oh, she would. And if she can get in that final two spot, she might just make me proud.
Mr. Personality. Seriously, it's scary that I find this show entertaining. I mean, it's like a horrific dating game. It's bad enough that she's gonna go through a pool of 20 men competing for her "love", but they're wearing scaring fucking masks, dude! I didn't watch the first show, but I heard it was good. And I had meant to watch the second show, but just completely forgot it would be on. About halfway through it, I guess, I happen to catch it while I'm channel surfing. And I'm serious as all hell when I say that it is fucking frightening. The first thing I see? A shot of the gal in her bikini, climbing into a hot tub full of guys...and oh what the fuck, they're wearing bright-ass scary-ass masks. And honestly, does anyone actually expect any good to come from this show? I mean, the girl's taking dating advice from Monica Lewinsky, you know she must have issues. And am I the only one who can tell which ones are attractive and unattractive even when their masks are on?
Oh, and I've become a trash television fan, as well. I find myself watching shows like Judge Judy, Moral Court, Elimidate, Jenny Jones...and yes, Jerry Springer. I know, what has happened to me? But it's funny, I swear! I kid you not, Judge Judy had to rule on a case the other day about a door-to-door salesperson/transvestite who wanted to be reimbursed by a couple who caused (s)he to lose his/her job because (s)he scared the fuck out of them and they tattled on him/her to his/her boss. Did you get all that? Whatever, it was funny as hell because you can just see in Judge Judy's eyes that she's wondering what the hell she's doing anymore...
And Talk Sex With Sue is the best show ever. Funny, funny, funny...hysterical, even! It's like getting to watch your grandma on TV...she sounds so old and sweet and grandma-ish and you just want to hug her and bake cookies with her and play bridge with her. And then (no, and then), she starts talking about sex and masturbation as she plays with dildos. I mean, it's so wrong on so many different levels, but so damn entertaining that you just can't stop yourself.
And I'm now going to stop myself because I'm realizing just how incredibly lame this all is...aw, but who cares, everyone knows I'm Prince Lame.
Television has become an essential part of my daily routine lately. Wake up in the morning, see what's on TV. While I'm getting ready, TV's on in the background. Back from class, turn on the TV. Done with homework, let's see what's on TV. 6:00, it's time for Will & Grace. And then, of course, there's all the shows that I've just become addicted to...
American Idol. Besides the fact that the plague known as Carmen stuck around as long as she did, I've thoroughly enjoyed this show. Compared to last year's show, the majority of this group actually has talent...and marketable talent, at that. But, even though I risk my life by saying anything of this sort....Clay Aiken should seriously just go away. EVERYTHING about that boy is just annoying as all hell...first off, he looks like a fucking alien. Everytime the spotlight shines down on him on stage, I'm thinking it's Scotty beaming him back up to the Enterprise or something. I wouldn't be surprised to find out that he's got some sort of mad Vulcan power or some shit. And then there's the lame-ass facial expressions he makes at the crowd. If I had to endure him squinting through an entire song one more time, I will be sawing away at my wrists as I watch. Oh, and for the teen girls out there....HE'S GAY!! He's not going to kiss you! Stop making those ridiculous posters! And Joshua Gracin? Oh I'm pop, no I'm country, no I'm pop again, whoops I'm country...wait, what am I supposed to be this week? GONE, that's what. Now that the war's over and 99% of Americans have mysteriously lost their newfound patriotism, Mr. Marine doesn't stand a chance of making it another week. Ruben. What can be said about him? He's gonna win. Duh. I think that even the diehard Clay fans know this and are plotting his assassination this very minute. I've loved Trenyce since the start of the show...and now that Kimberly Caldwell has bit the dust, she and Kimberly Locke are the only two I'm actually rooting for. Once they're both gone, I will be as well. It will take an absolute miracle for either of them to be one of the last two standing...I mean, you can have an entire speed dialing posse assembled for these two and the fans of Clay/Ruben will still conquer all. And will Ryan Seacrest please officially come out of the closet already so Simon will stop trying to pull him out of it?
Survivor. It's no secret that I love Survivor. Anyone who remotely knows me, knows this. Way back when I first started this blog, I would lamely give my weekly predictions about the Marquesas season...and 9.9 times out of 10, I was so off it wasn't even funny. And I'm sure that if I were to do the same thing this season, I'd be just as off. But, I must say...this season has been the most entertaining since the original. Even though the whole boys vs. girls vibe was totally gone after about four episodes, it's still been a fun ride. I'm rooting for Jenna at this point...because she's just a bitch and I don't care. I want to see a bitch win this thing for once. On the reunion show, I want to see her look into all the other contestant's eyes and say, "Nyah nyah, I whooped your asses, losers." And she would...oh, she would. And if she can get in that final two spot, she might just make me proud.
Mr. Personality. Seriously, it's scary that I find this show entertaining. I mean, it's like a horrific dating game. It's bad enough that she's gonna go through a pool of 20 men competing for her "love", but they're wearing scaring fucking masks, dude! I didn't watch the first show, but I heard it was good. And I had meant to watch the second show, but just completely forgot it would be on. About halfway through it, I guess, I happen to catch it while I'm channel surfing. And I'm serious as all hell when I say that it is fucking frightening. The first thing I see? A shot of the gal in her bikini, climbing into a hot tub full of guys...and oh what the fuck, they're wearing bright-ass scary-ass masks. And honestly, does anyone actually expect any good to come from this show? I mean, the girl's taking dating advice from Monica Lewinsky, you know she must have issues. And am I the only one who can tell which ones are attractive and unattractive even when their masks are on?
Oh, and I've become a trash television fan, as well. I find myself watching shows like Judge Judy, Moral Court, Elimidate, Jenny Jones...and yes, Jerry Springer. I know, what has happened to me? But it's funny, I swear! I kid you not, Judge Judy had to rule on a case the other day about a door-to-door salesperson/transvestite who wanted to be reimbursed by a couple who caused (s)he to lose his/her job because (s)he scared the fuck out of them and they tattled on him/her to his/her boss. Did you get all that? Whatever, it was funny as hell because you can just see in Judge Judy's eyes that she's wondering what the hell she's doing anymore...
And Talk Sex With Sue is the best show ever. Funny, funny, funny...hysterical, even! It's like getting to watch your grandma on TV...she sounds so old and sweet and grandma-ish and you just want to hug her and bake cookies with her and play bridge with her. And then (no, and then), she starts talking about sex and masturbation as she plays with dildos. I mean, it's so wrong on so many different levels, but so damn entertaining that you just can't stop yourself.
And I'm now going to stop myself because I'm realizing just how incredibly lame this all is...aw, but who cares, everyone knows I'm Prince Lame.
Tuesday, April 29, 2003
No, How YOU Doing?
Yup, so I'm back. I know, I'm such a fucking slacker. But hey, what the hell else is new?
I thought about maybe redesigning this blog of mine, giving it a new look to accompany my return. Wouldn't that have been nice? Yeah, I thought so, too. But.....blogger's designs are just plain icky and I'm too computer stupid to actually make a design of my own. So guess what? Sandbox at night or whatever that bullshit is called is still the theme.
Did you notice I picked up quite the potty mouth in my absence?
Things are good. Relatively. Remotely. Whatever, good. No real complaints, no real jumps for joy...just me, happy to be alive and well and loved and blah blah blah. Blah. Notice my sentence structure has kinda gone to shit in my absence as well. I use lots of one-word sentences. Crazy. See, I've done it again. Amazing.
Heh.
So, why the return now? Well, I took a little break for a lot of reasons. Numero uno, I was busy as fuck all the time. Or at least it seemed that way. Dos, I just lost my focus there for a while. I'd sit down to write myself a little entry and I'd find myself thinking, "Self, you don't have jack shit to say today...don't bore these poor individuals with your nonsense." And finalmente, I just couldn't find the fun in blogging anymore. Now I've realized that this can be fun, I can say whatever the hell I want to say...and if you've got a problem with it, buddy, go some fucking where else. Hee.
I'm back. Aren't you glad?
Yup, so I'm back. I know, I'm such a fucking slacker. But hey, what the hell else is new?
I thought about maybe redesigning this blog of mine, giving it a new look to accompany my return. Wouldn't that have been nice? Yeah, I thought so, too. But.....blogger's designs are just plain icky and I'm too computer stupid to actually make a design of my own. So guess what? Sandbox at night or whatever that bullshit is called is still the theme.
Did you notice I picked up quite the potty mouth in my absence?
Things are good. Relatively. Remotely. Whatever, good. No real complaints, no real jumps for joy...just me, happy to be alive and well and loved and blah blah blah. Blah. Notice my sentence structure has kinda gone to shit in my absence as well. I use lots of one-word sentences. Crazy. See, I've done it again. Amazing.
Heh.
So, why the return now? Well, I took a little break for a lot of reasons. Numero uno, I was busy as fuck all the time. Or at least it seemed that way. Dos, I just lost my focus there for a while. I'd sit down to write myself a little entry and I'd find myself thinking, "Self, you don't have jack shit to say today...don't bore these poor individuals with your nonsense." And finalmente, I just couldn't find the fun in blogging anymore. Now I've realized that this can be fun, I can say whatever the hell I want to say...and if you've got a problem with it, buddy, go some fucking where else. Hee.
I'm back. Aren't you glad?
